How would you deal with an abusive in-law…?

Ok so my sister's married to the biggest @ss on the planet and normally I wouldn’t involve myself in other people’s affairs, but my younger sister (not the one married to him) who’s staying with them happened to be on the receiving end of one of his ***** fits last night.





We were on the phone talking when this man started ripping into her about some camera he was missing. Even though my little sister isn’t that young (she’s 16) she’s still a very naïve and passive person who does not know how to deal with confrontation. I’m on the line basically listening to this loser yell and berate her for 10 minutes while she did not say a word. She was so shook she couldn’t even hand the phone over so I could deal with him, which frustrated me to no end. I don’t live in the same city as them so going over was not an option.





I spoke to the woman married to him today and her response was “what can I do, you know how he is”. I’m at the point where I’m seriously considering having this man dealt with physically. But he’s the sole provider for the house - not to mention the father of my nieces and nephews - so I’m not sure if putting him in a hospital bed again would be the best way to go.





What would you do in this situation?How would you deal with an abusive in-law…?
if i was your man baby you would not have to deal with that, it would be my job to get assholes up off youHow would you deal with an abusive in-law…?
The best thing to do in this situation is to keep your distance. Is there anyway the Lil Sister can live with someone else? Who is he to disrespect and chastise her? I would get her out of that house immediately, and let the sister married to him know that she's welcomed to call, but as long as her husband is being disrespectful and rude, he's not welcomed in my home
Why is your sister choosing to stay with that sister? She needs to get out. If you other sister chooses to get verbally abused thats her decision. This minor should not have to deal with it. Can she come stay with you or another relative?
I would go over there and personally put a bat to his F*king head, I don't play that disrespectful shyt and your sister who is married to him need to get some backbone nd beat his damn azz!





Sole provider or not, she doesn't need to be with that loser. She cn get his azz for child support when she leaves!





If I was you I would have told my sister to put the bastard on the phone.





I remember one of my sisters told me that my mothers bf was yelling and screaming at my 5 year old brother for no reason, so I called and told my brother to put the azzhole on the phone, and I said ';I don't appreciate you yelling and screaming at my F*king brother, if you want to scream at something you better scream at your F*king dick and leave my f*king brother alone.'; I told him this while ,my mother was in the hous too and all he had to say was ';I wasn't screaming at him I was yelling at the next door neighbor.'; That N IGGA knows not to play any shyt with my mother, sisters or brother!
is your big sister the legal guardian of your little sister???......because if she isn't you guys should get something arranged where she can live with some loving relatives.....or maybe she can live with you





I think you should go over there with like an older guy cousin and sit him down and have quite a long chat with him.......because I am kind of scared he might go too far one day and hit your baby sister....and that might drive you crazy





you guys need to talk about it.....and your big sister needs to get some balls.......real talk!!!......I can just imagine how he treats her
Confront them first to let them know, if anything happens he will be dealt with. Then avoid them like the plague. That's the best I can do. Because me being me, I would go over there and yell at him like he did her and dare him to swing. Give me a excuse to pull out a can whip ***, that's long over due.
Well other than being an as$hole, what does he do thats so bad that you need to make it physical? Also would that really solve anything? No. All that would do is turn you into the enemy. There's nothing you really can do unless he's breaking the law or being abusive.


Your sister is a big girl and she's just going to learn how to fight her own battles.
Hi Gig,





I am so sad to hear about this situation, unfortunately it's a common thing in many households...even mine at one time.





This is such a touchy, touchy situation even worse because its in another state.


Putting him in the hospital not only won't help but it will fuel his fire and the fury will be taken out on your sister.





The most you can do is just have ALL of your family's presence known, even if it takes everyone to call both your sisters once a day.





The only way this issue is to be resolved would be on your sister's end. SHE has to have enough.





Being as though your little sister was afraid to give him the phone indicates she has already been affected by his abusiveness. ( I feel like crying).......the children are the ones to suffer the mose I have come to learn.





Until you and your family can figure out a better way, I would have your little sisted join support groups, get herself involved in as many activities as she can, to at least kee her mind on other things.....





God Bless GIG
Well, what can you really do?





GiG, you can't go over to HIS house trying to bring the whole place down... IDK how it works in Canada, but in the US, if you came to my house with that, I could hurt you... And I wouldn't be in the wrong. You would...





I'm ALL for you going over there to speak to him (If you can), but be civil about it. Don't go over there jumping bad and making threats; you catch more bees with honey than vinegar. Hell, even pull your sister to the side and speak to her. Don't speak to them in a harsh tone, but be sure it's firm. Can you have anyone else in your family (Brothers, aunts, uncles, mom, etc) call and speak to them both also?





I don't recommend having someone beat him up or anything, because then you'll be worse than he is... Not to mention your sister will be pissed at you, and you could potentially get in trouble with the law.





I suggest you call when you know you'll catch him home alone... It'll probably catch him off guard, but let him know you don't appreciate the way he has been speaking to your sister. Tell him you don't care what he does to or with his wife (I'm sure you do), but when it come to your sister... He WILL respect her, because she isn't his child. Not only that, she is no longer a child.
This is a touchy situation because it's involving quite a few people, so its best to keep the confrontation as discreet as possible, meaning you'll have to speak to him firm and blunt with just the two of you. If you have a plan of ';attack'; that'll involve your sister who's married to him, you can have her present too. Just boldly tell him off that he needs to calm the f**k down because its upsetting your family and he shouldn't lash out at you women. Try not to result to using too many heavy curse words because its usually a trigger to an all-out argument. Its all about being straight to the point without causing MORE tension. Get your point across and have his confirmation that he understands.
Hmph! Sounds like we have the same brother-in-law. I'm fixing to mail my sister an iron skillet and some grits....





You may need to go out there and have a sit-down with both of your sisters and seriously talk about what's what. And then cook up some hot grits and pick up a skillet and have a ';serious conversation'; with your brother-in-law about how he's going to treat your sisters. Some men are kinda dumb that way and require visual aids.
this guy is an Idiot and he has no right verbally


abusing your sister, can you Imagine if that one the first altercation on the next one he will hit her


the problem is this your little sister lives with them and he thinks that he has all the rights to belittle her and be ugly and abusive because that is his house and she is just an outsider and he deal with you little sister in any way he wants


and why is your little sister afraid of him? has he hit her and she does not want to tell? talk to you other sister and find out
hey girl, what you need to do is take affirmative, LEGAL, action. do not lose your head. i am assuming that this man is not just someone who gets angry sometimes and gets on to his family when he thinks they are at fault with something. petition the court system for custody of your sister if his verbal abuse is to excessive. do NOT do anything physical becausse it only makes you look like the bad guy to the law. you have just as much right to be guardian to your sister as the other one. the only downfall is that your other sister is married and you are not, however if the guy is providing an unsafe environment and you can prove it, take it to the courts. i don't know how the canadian system works. but i do know you should not try confronting anyone in a disrespectful manner ESPECIALLY if he is a well off or wealthy well to do man. good luck girl talk to ya later