Whats the deal with men and porn ?

i have been with my boyfreind for almost 2 years now and im pregnant with his son due in april in september of 2008 i didnt knw he was into porn but had a feeling he was doing something behind my back like it or cheating because we hadnt had sex in about 3 weeks anyways the next morning i go ahead and accuse him without knowing and he denies it then i go ahead and tell him i saw him with my own eyes he finally admitts to it and assures me it will never happen again now 6 months later i find he was looking at it again so i question him and he admits to it right off the bat and i ask him why but then he gets all deffensive and never wants to touch the subject hes told me its just he pictures me and him doing the things these women are doing but why does it bother him to talk about it ...it has become an everyday thing and honestly it bothers me that he goes and gets all aroused and then comes to have sex with me ..... what should i do it hurts me i feel betrayed and i also feel like he will eventually cheat on me the only thing i can think of is these women dress sleezy and in high heels and stuff like that i dont do that i did it one time and he was super excited about it but i honestly dont feel comfortable dressing that way and why should i if he wants to see other woman why should i be what he wants when he doesnt care how he makes me feel?? some one tell meWhats the deal with men and porn ?
First of all, you need to realize that (and I know its' coming, that I'm a sexists) but if you are due in April, you are really not thinking straight right now. Your body is going crazy in a million different directions. So think about it. Every time you went emotional about it, you were pregnant, right? So why don't you explain to him that. Wait until after the baby is born then approach the subject.





However, why does it bother you so much? Most couples tend to enjoy it together, it is a very harmless fantasy - nobody is cheating on anyone. Why does it make you feel so bad to dress the same way in the privacy of your own house? Is it because you are ashamed of how you used to dress and these women remind you of a time of your life you would rather forget? Listen, you don't have to turn into Mother Theresa just because you are in a committed relationship and you are expecting a baby. I'm not saying start dressing like a hooker, but in the privacy of your own house you are allowed to do whatever you want. So maybe that could be one of you guys' things.





Don't make snap decisions while you are preganant, your hormones are all over the map. You get pissed off over bread crumbs on the counter, now is not the time to get into a highly emotional argument. And your boyfriend should understand that as well. If he doesn't tell him. This has nothing to do with being a pig - this is biology 101.Whats the deal with men and porn ?
what's the deal with women and shoes???





porn is a selfish indulgence... a pasttime that needs nothing special...
Porn makes little me happy.
I dont do porn, never have, and never probably will.





However, whats the harm in it?? Hes not cheating on you, and not touching anyone else. As long as its not illegal porn (kiddie, etc) then theres no harm being done so chill out and let him be!
men are pigs. i should know. im the only guy i know who isn't. they make me embarrassed to be a guy
they're retarded. They're unfaithful and immature
It's not personal, just sometimes men like to enjoy fantasies.





It doesn't mean he doesn't love you or fancy you, it's just a change.
Being a guy I know that guys have a great imagination. I think that maybe the reason he is doing that is because he wants something a little more kinky, or just to do something new in bed, or maybe not even in the bed. He may just be afraid to admit it or afraid of your denial to try new things. He may not want to talk about it but you have to approach the situation. Ask him if he wants to try some of the things he sees with you or if he is just looking for something new to do with you.
Men are very visual people. They're more easily aroused by images. It bothered me a lot too with my ex. I knew he watched it and I just asked him to watch it when I'm not in the apartment. I had a lot of issues with that, but I just had to accept that it's something a lot of men do. It doesn't mean they're going to cheat. Some couples watch it together to get ideas but I get the feeling you're like me and don't want to have anything to do with it. The best thing to do is to accept that he is going to watch it and try to arrange things so you don't have to know about it.
My boyfriend watches porn like on the regular on this computer..WHY? I have no clue does it bother me? Humm No. My question is why would they rather watch it than have the real thing you know. We just had our daughter in Nov 08 so I'm not even bothered by other women right now ... it's such a cliche but '; I'm HIS BABY'S MOMMA';.. You know you need to try ';the sleezy clothes'; in bed for him..if that's what he likes..well he's your man DO WORK.
I think he is just doing dirty things for his sexual satisfaction, but he is not cheating you...


TRY TO UNDERSTAND.......controlling sexual desires of a male is very very difficult... we mastrubate a lot.. unless he is doing anything with anathor female .. his mistakes are worth forgiving... if u think he is doing very bad thing by masturbating or watching porn stuff.... then u are harsh on him... its very bad for his health.. so its ur responsibility to take him out of there with love and SMILE !


Dont be angry please...
My boyfriend also watched it and i asked him not to since i just preferred he didn't and he said he would stop. I've probably found it on his computer 5 or so times since then and i told him i'll deal with him watching it as long as he doesn't lie. He says he doesn't now and i actually believe him because of things i won't go into. But I can tell you that most guys probably won't stop just because you ask them to because they're visual people when it comes to sex and getting turned on and it's kind of a big thing to them i guess. And just because he's watching porn, doesn't mean he is cheating on you.
I had the same problem with my husband. It hurt deeply. I found this while researching the topic. My husband read it and doesn't do it anymore. I know because I got webwatch for awhile to moniter his online behavior. He didn't know I did that so his refraining is his own doing. I'm glad because the lies and all almost broke up my marriage.





It is not OK behavior. It is a perverse and ridiculous intrusion into your relationship. It is an insult, it is disloyal and it is cheating.





Consider how it makes your partner feel. If it makes your partner feel ugly, hurt, deceived, lied to or inadequate, then it needs to stop. If it is eroding your relationship, it's gone too far.





Pornography isn't real, it's a fantasy. It's makeup, beauty lenses, hair extensions, camera angles, lighting and silicone! It's also somebody's daughter who has taken a really, really wrong turn. She's demeaning herself, debasing herself, humiliating herself and she's being exploited by people who are funded by you. It is a sick, demented, twisted world. It's not healthy, it's not natural and it's not normal.





Viewing Internet pornography or engaging in cybersex is a short step to taking cheating to the next level.





You need to tell your partner that viewing pornography is absolutely, unequivocally unacceptable in your relationship. Draw a line: Your partner needs to choose between the pornography or the relationship.





Ask yourself or your partner:





Would you do it with your partner standing right there?





Are you turning outside of your relationship to meet a need that should be met within the relationship? You can't change what you don't acknowledge, so find out if you or your partner have a problem.





Do you justify the behavior by saying, ';It's harmless,'; ';Everyone does it,'; or ';It's just the Internet';?





Does it intrude on your relationship?





Which is more important: pornography or your relationship





Good luck to you. Some woman aren't bothered by it if their partner is honest about it. It is usually the hiding and lies that hurt the most. If it hurts you and bothers you he should stop. What is more important...your feelings or his eye candy fun?
Maybe he performs better in bed if he gets aroused by porn first. If you are having amazing sex leave the issue alone. I think the book titled ';He's just not that into you'; deals with this subject. I can't believe it's been two years and you are just finding out he is into porn. As long as you keep up your appearance he probably won't cheat on you even if he is unhappy with being in a committed relationship.
Most normal men look at porn. It doesn't mean he isn't into you or that he's into floozies, it just means that every once in a while he likes enjoying some fantasy he doesn't want to ask you about. There are also times when you can't sleep with him because you're busy. If you don't let him take care of himself then he might just go to another woman. For now, I think you're safe. Your boyfriend has a healthy appetite for sex and an appreciation for the female body chooses you over all over women.
Men are more visual in sex than women are. Women are more fantasy orientated.


My first husband was all into the porn thing and didnt like sex with me much. I found that all men born under the bull sign in chinese horoscopes tend to prefer porn to the real thing.


thier years is 1961 1973 1985 1997. not all of the are that way. if they are with thier perfect match they are ok. but still reserved.


If he was born under the rabbit sign or goat sign they just like alot of sex and that could be why. Definately check out yours also to see what your perfect match is.
Your attitude is wrong. would you rather he go screw someone on the side. it's just a form of getting aroused for some people. maybe you don't enjoy it but he does. it gives a relationship meaning. he watches to find ways to excite him and you. Stop letting it bother you. he doesn't want to talk about it lol you scream in hisface for doing it.
men are perverts.......dats all. their whole lives revolve around sex
Porn is a big problem - -


You have a right to be upset.


You can do nothing to change him - He has to come to a place where he wants to change - that may or may not happen.


Porn is addictive and sets up a false world. The women in the pictures make no demands, they give the man an adrenlin rush, it sets up unhealthy degrading sexual patterns, where sexual intamcy is diminshed if not completely desimated. You will become more of an object to him - that is my opinion.


You can only decide if you want to live with it or not. I will say this - In the long run porn will not enhance your relationship with your boy friend but will hurt it.


You are not wrong in your feelings and for sure not alone.


Look at your options - women are so vulnerable to the man once they are pregnant but you do still have choices. I would examine them. Do you want your life to go down this road?


Will he have an affair? Porn is an affair.
Bored with his sex life. Likes looking at sex. Wishes he and you would do some of those things but is affaird to ask.





You feel betrayed because he wants to have sex with you after watching pron. Would you feel better if he didnt.





You both need to talk this out. Seems neither one is talking about everthing. Ask he what watching porn does for him? Then ask why?





I said ask. Dont fight or go off the deep end.





Last why not sit and watch it with him to see what is so interesting to him instead of going off the deep end.





Watching porn could be signs of a problem with your releationship.





Good Luck
I understand...i would be angry too if my man was watching porn...i would feel so unattractive and unappreciated...especially if he was cutting down on our sex...and like...i dont like him seeing other naked women...thats not for the eyes of a committed man...





I dont know how to help u fix ur issue...all u can do it talk to him...tell him how u feel...and hope he respects ur feelings...if ur not happi at all then theres nothing to do but leave him...i wouldnt wanna live an unhappi life...especially if my partner was too selfish to care about the way i feel!





In saying that...he prolly is bored with his sex life...do something to spice it up...dress the way he likes u to once in awhile...not specifically to go out...just to turn him on LOL...i guess there r things u gota do to get his interest back on u...dont give up!!!
you can get a computer software that put a block on the porn site just seach the internet for them it help you and your partner,