To do men deal with abortions? and how can we fix ourselvs?

my boyfriend and i have been together for 5 years now. when i got pregnant he knew before i did. he said he could feel it! anyways i just had an abortion and its been hard for me every single day. I was planning to keep the baby but my boyfriend decided that he rather us have an abortion then be poor and not give our baby anything... we had no were to live no money or anything.. at first i was just going to be a single mom and try to work my way through it but when we talked about it he wanted to do things the right way.. by getting married haveing our own place and everything.... so since my parents dont even like him or anything and i knew things were going to be extreamly hard because my dad was never going to be apart of any of this i thought maybe he was right but i ended up walking away from 2 abortion clinics finally he made me an appointment himself and said that if i came back pregnant still that he would just leave me completly and act like it was never even his kid. so anyways i ended up going through with it at the last minute! his family is really against abortions so we were going to keep this to ourselves but then he totally threw me under the bus and told his family that he never wants to see me or be with me again cuz i had the abortion! Now his family hates ME! i dont understand if this is something that he is upset about or what but i mean this was his idea! he wanted me to have the abortion and i begged him to just give us a chance but now he is acting like i did this all by myself! what hurts the most is that i thought we were in this together and if i knew he was going to leave either way i would have kept the baby and went on with my life without him... so to make a long story short is this just him lashing out at me because maybe he didnt want me to have it or what is it? how do guys deal with this and how do they end up feeling in the end? We actually tried talking yesterday about it but he said hes not over everything and he needs his space...? i dont understand because this is what he wanted! now hes planning his life to leave and all this stuff and im so confused i still want to be with him even though he hurt me alot and i still want a baby! i want to try again with him but i know he is just going to act like he doesnt care about anything.... i dont know how to handle this because how do i even bring up having a baby with him now? i know he regrets it alot (everything that he told me) i can see it in his face and the way he acts now... i dont thin k he relized what he was asking me to do so know how do i bring up having a baby after all this i know he want one and so do i this was a HUGE mistake! please someone help w/ out calling me stupid or anything please!!!To do men deal with abortions? and how can we fix ourselvs?
Wow, you choose to kill your baby just to be with him. It kinda stupid if you asked me. You've make the stupid decision. He don't love you, he just want to used you. You don't need a man like him in your life. Don't waste your time on him anymore.. move on...To do men deal with abortions? and how can we fix ourselvs?
Wow, he sounds like a jerk. I think you should distance yourself from him. Trust me,you don't want to bring a baby into a bunch of drama. What is done is done. If he didn't want you to have an abortion, then he should have said so.





Now you both have to move on, and it would probably be best if it was separately. Finish your education and earn some money, so, when your ready, you can have a baby under the best possible circumstances. Babies deserve the best you can give them!
Why would you want to have a baby with a guy like this. He is a jerk and should not ever have the chance to reproduce. Kiss his butt goodbye and move on with your life. You don't need a moron like that in your life.
Why would you ever get an abortion just to please a man? Didn't you do any research and see that this tears couples apart, not to mention it causes deep wounds in a woman's soul? I don't feel bad for people that murder their children, and that is what abortion is, especially ones that do it for a man. Not to say I don't think they need love and support. But you need to get yourself together and look at why you really would want to be with someone like that. Although you made a mistake by having an abortion, that doesn't mean you can't fix things within yourself for yourself. God forgives us all for the things we do wrong when we turn to Him and ask Him to forgive us. Maybe you need to sit down and talk to a pastor or someone you can confide in. Maybe seek a counselor.





Don't ever let a man tell you what to do with your life. Sadly, this abortion will probably haunt you the rest of your life. I am sorry you didn't seek advice before you were lead to do this. I pray that you will find peace about all this.





I hope you don't take anything I say the wrong way, but I am just trying to be honest. God bless you.
Yepp you should have left him and went to your parents that baby could have had a good life. I think you should move on.. there is going to be a time where you want kids and do you think tthat hes going to want them... probably not.
This is why you don't allow anyone especially a man order you what to do with YOUR body. Sounds to me like the @$$hole wanted to break up with you but didn't want to have to pay child support on a kid. He doesn't want his family to hate him for the abortion so he puts that off on you.I personally don't believe in abortion i think it's murder but what's done is done. INstead of worrying about this loser that convinced you to kill your baby than left you when you needed him the most, drop him, get yourself some counseling (because i know you probably need some after all this) than get yourself together so that if you get pregnant again you know you can do it on your own if the father happens to be another jack @$$ like this one. I am a single mother of soon to be four and yes it's hard but i wouldn't trade my babies for anything and it's their dads loss for not being in their lives cuz i have 3 1/2 AMAZING ANGELS. good luck hun i hope you get your mind right and realize this man is not worth the breath to even say good bye too.
I hope to God you have learned from this. you could have given up the baby for adoption. but besides that, you should never let a guy force you to do ANYTHING you dont want to do. Me and my bf were together a year and a half when i got pregnant and he told me same thing, have an abortion or i will leave. I said, see ya! Guys come and go, but a child is forever. I dont agree with abortions, or with what you did and your reasons. But I know what it is like for a guy to mess with your head and control you. Forget about him. And his stupid family. He is so not worth it. When he meets his maker, he will have to answer for what he has done. My bf and I are still together, he realized he couldnt make me do anything i didnt want to do, and he is excited about the baby now, and I am 22 weeks. You should get away from this guy, but if you wont or cant, you have to talk to him about everything, how you feel, and tell him to tell his family what he did. If you end up having a kid with him, his family may still resent you because of the decision they think you made on your own. Dont rush into anything with him, especially another baby. You would be better off to leave him, get your self and life together, and find someone who actually loves you for you, not because you will do whatever they tell you to. I would hate to see another baby being aborted because of you making the same mistake again.